This post is written in reflection of my ride on 2/9/20.
Again, we lucked out on a sunny Sunday despite bad weather leading up until; tornado, flooding, and snow all graced our region the latter half of last week. Feeling discouraged from last Sunday’s solo endeavor, I felt tinges of hesitation awaken in the base of my stomach. But in the words of my man, “a nervous Nellie is no good.” We started off fine and as usual, my man zipping along on his Katana, and me following behind at a slower speed. I don’t worry though, either I’ll catch up or he’ll find a place to wait for me. I practice rolling on and off the throttle as we glide down familiar roads, mentally reciting the wrist directions that make me speed up and the one that makes me slow down. Previously, I kept confusing which direction did what and the high whir of the RPMs sent panicky anxiety through my arms when trying to stop. Establishing muscle memory is the main way to resolve my control issues, and me talking to myself in my helmet works wonders.
We pull easily into a roomy gas station, fill up, and ease back into the light traffic; I feel much more calm with merging onto the live roadway. I finally realized why I was struggling with stopping – a helpful discovery. I was trying to use the clutch, the front brake, and the back brake until coming to a full stop, and then frantically trying to balance at a halt and get my feet on the pavement. But If I slow using all three and then switch to just the clutch and front brake, I can stick my legs out while I coast and find the ground much more smoothly. This may be obvious to others, but whatever, here we are.
So apparently each ride is going to have a scary moment for me to “woman up” through. After leaving the gas station, we’re stopping and going through traffic lights, and the face protector that I fashion as a barrier between my helmet and my earrings slips down and covers my eyes. Naturally, this is terrible. We’re stopped behind cars as the light is turning green, cars are behind us, I can’t open my helmet visor to move the cloth from my eyes with my right hand as my left holds the clutch, and both me and my man have ear plugs in preventing him from hearing my problem. He sees I’m in distress, and I can see just enough out of my left eye under the edge of the cloth to follow him onto a side street. I continue pass him to flat ground, stop in neutral to rip off my helmet, and clear my vision. I’m shaky even though I don’t see how I could have done anything differently. This instance served as a reminder that I can think, research, and reflect all I want, but there will always be factors outside of my control.
We pull back to the red light, turning right. I find myself trying to “prepare” myself; I note the busy intersection, limited view, on an incline, and concerns start firing in my head. You’re going to fall over, you’re going to stall out, you’re not going to shift up fast enough. Record scratch. Why am I thinking this? I ask myself. I can fix literally every one of these situations. And if I can’t, I know my boyfriend will help me. When I pulled over, a driver stopped and asked if I needed help. It’s not sink or swim; I have life jackets, buoys, and a support system of bobbers who want me to skim over the waves. No fear. Nofearnofearnofearnofear. I stop on the incline, and then ease out smoothly through the friction zone after babe, AND I FEEL VERY ACCOMPLISHED because I’m squashing my hesitation a little more with each success, no matter how small.
After about 20 miles on the interstate, we end up back at a river we seem to frequent. I enjoyed this interstate leg much more than I did two weeks ago, and I keep up better this week, even overtaking babe at one point. The speed and the other cars aren’t what bothers me, but the wind resistance is the real challenge. You got to plant yourself on that bike, like a tree frog to a branch or a baby koala holding on to mama’s back.
I’m feeling much more confident on my motorcycle. It’s frustrating to only be able to ride once a week, and I know my progress will speed up when I can ride every day. But right now with the circumstances, it’s the best I can do. I’m excited every time I ride and see small improvements, such as stopping and setting my feet down, speeding up smoothly through right turns on an incline, and having consistent higher speeds on the interstate. Finding transitions between actions is making riding a lot more predictable and fun.
For my next session, my focuses are:
- Lean more through turns.
- Continue to work on consistent high speeds.
- Stop overthinking.
Tiny Tidbits:
- I’m finding how important it is to check your ego and be coachable. My determination can quickly turn to pigheadedness which helps no one, least of all me.
- Don’t be scared; don’t be stupid either, but don’t let fear of mistakes or new situations stop you from getting out there. You grow beyond your comfort zone.
- You control your thoughts, and your thoughts control your actions. Think about the situation but don’t agonize over it.
Go get ’em, ladies! #nofear
MotoMoxie 